Whoops!

So I know it has been a while since I update and you are probably all thinking that I haven't been doing anything at all but that is not true. I went on two runs last week and did some belly excersizes, I finally got the yoga mat from my aunt so that helped. I haven't been good about drinking my protein shakes like I wanted to be, so I fail on that but since I am off the BC I have a huge appetite and I am eating a lot more so I don't want to gain too much weight. I need to go back into GNC and ask some questions now that my situation has changed a bit. Anyways, Belly excersizes are very hard, my lower back is out really bad so it feels like the tip of my spine is grinding into the floor when I do the leg lifts for the lower belly flab. So that is really discouraging. I have gotten frustrated a lot by working out but I have been pretty good at staying consistent. Better than in the past anyways. I am trying to drink more water and such also and I think I am doing alright at that because my lips aren't as dry as they usually are. OH, and I watched more of the belly dancing video and I have learned a little bit more, its just hard to follow because it moves so fast and I need to watch and do as the video is or I second guess myself. So its going to be a while until I have gotten those moves down. Anyways, that's it for the update, I will be going for a run either later today or tomorrow. See ya.

I am so incredibly frustrated!

So I got the birth control taken out of my arm, and I had stitches put in so I tried to avoid any major excersize while they were in, now they are out (just taken out yesterday) and my appetite has increased ten fold. I can feel the fat on my belly returning and I am not liking it, I was perfectly happy with my belly the way it was. Anyways, I went running three days ago and for a walk yesterday so I haven't been completely slouching. I tried doing some belly excersizes tonight and I just want to cry I am so frustrated. I don't feel it hardly at all even though I am tightening my stomach muscles while working out and everything, my back and legs hurt more than my stomach so I am worried I am doing it all wrong and it is really frustrating! Jeeze, how many times can I say that in one post. I don't know what to do, because if I am doing it wrong I don't want to hurt myself, but I can't not do anything, I have to do belly work outs everyday, or every other day. And I have those stupid protein shakes to drink and those are just going to put more weight on me. And I am going to have to go back into GNC and talk to the guys in there and see if they have any tips to help me out because I really hate this. I feel gross and disgusting and frustrated and I don't like it at all. I thought you were suppose to feel good after working out but I just want to cry and scream. I really wish my husband was here so he could help me stay motivated. I just suck and fail as a human being. It's horrible. But what can I do? I mean, really? There isn't anything I can do but keep trying and push past and ask questions. UGH! I just wanna cry right now. I am pretty sure thats cuss my body is adjusting to not having any hormones in it but its still very irritating. Anyways I am done, this was not a very inspiring post and for that I apologize.

A small set-back

So it was raining today, and I live in Washington so that is fairly normal but I do not have the proper gear for running in the rain so I failed at that. Didn't have my damned protein shake, failed at that, and I am going to do a couple of sit ups before bed just so I don't feel like a complete and total failure. Anyways, those aren't really the set backs that I was referring to, no the real set back happens tomorrow.

So in November of 2011 I got the Implanon birth control in my arm and it has completely messed with the chemical makeup of my body and I have had a period for four months straight. Yes, gross and too much information but bottom line is I have to have the damn thing removed. To remove it they have to cut my arm where it is inserted into and pull it out, tissues has grown around it so it is going to be rather painful. When I had the Implanon put in I was down for two days straight because of the pain and my arm was unusable, I have no idea what will happen this time. I was able to use my arm again after the two days, but it still hurt for about a week or two, I had a huge bruise on my arm. So the point I am trying to make here is I don't know how much working out I will be able to do in the coming week. I am still going to try and run, and do some sit ups, maybe a little bit of belly dancing since it doesn't require too much arm movement but if I don't post anything for a while its cuss I am depressed I am unable to follow my plan. Hopefully healing wont take nearly as long as I think its going to and I will be up and moving in no time, but I really have no clue right now. Thank you all for reading, I do hope to be on here again very soon. I will be back, my determination is not dead!

Today was a failure!

Yeah, I didn't do anything today, or drink any of my protein shake. I had of course planned to, but the laziness of Saturday got in my way I guess. I didn't eat hardly anything either so I am hungry right now but all I want is a pizza. Well, a pizza and fruit. I am going to look up some recipes online tonight and put together a shopping list so I have plenty to eat this week for breakfast and lunch and stuff and maybe if I have more food in my system it will help keep me motivated. I still haven't received the yoga mat, which puts a damper in my plans and my back has been killing me which makes me less motivated, but at the very least I will go for a short run tomorrow. That is a promise I am making to myself that I plan on keeping.

I got the shoes!

Yup, that's right my shoes came in yesterday. I would have made a post yesterday but by the time i sat down to do it I was so exhausted. So after I got my shoes I put on my workout gear and went for a little ten minute walk/run down the street. That was enough to knock me out. I am so out of shape, but it felt really good. My muscles in my arms hurt more than anything else which is really weird. My aunt is bringing me over the yoga mat tonight and she is going to show me a couple of stretches to do after I get done running because I didn't know you had to stretch after a run. Yes I am that much of a novice. I only got one protein shake down yesterday, they are so filling. But I am going to try to get another one down today, baby steps as I have been told. I figure one day I will run the next I will do the other work out plans. I might do two protein shakes a day since I am working out every day. I don't know though we will have to see how it goes. And I absolutely love my shoes!

My Shoes! Whoo! Brooks Addiction 10 women's running!

The plan continues!

So today was good, I was able to replace the protein shake container that smelled rotten for a new one and I got advice from the guy at GNC about running and he said I may end up loosing weight instead of gaining and that would be a BIG problem, so we will just have to wait and see. I also bought myself a light jacket with zip up pockets so when I run I can take my phone and some mace. My aunt says that is a must since I will be alone and have music and well, people aren't the most trustworthy. So now all I am waiting for are my shoes, which still didn't come in today. I tried drinking more vanilla protein shake and it still made me feel sick. I don't know if that's just because I have been eating more recently so I am more full or if it just has that effect on me. Either way I will have the vanilla on days I don't work out and one in the morning on days that I do work out and the other two shakes on the days I work out will be chocolate. I still don't know how I am going to consume that much while continuing to eat real food because I was so full today but I did have more energy which is I guess a really good sign. About mid afternoon I was really tired though. Anyways, that's the update for today, going to work out tomorrow, we will see how that goes! Oh one last thing I guess taking a fish oil supplement would help my joints and my aunt has weights and a yoga mat for me so I don't have to buy any. Hooray!

Victory is Mine! Sorta...

Ok, so I said that today I was going to try and work out and I actually did. I spent five minutes on my work out ball warming up and doing some push ups and sit ups, then I used my weight ball, and then I watched an ab video and then I did a little bit of belly dancing to cool down. It wasn't much, but at least I got some done. My shoes will hopefully be here tomorrow so I can start running, and my protein shake bottle doesn't smell nearly as funky anymore. It just kinda smells like an older shake but doesn't smell bad... If that even makes any sense at all. So starting tomorrow I drink the protein shake and hopefully I will be able to go for a short run. After working with the weight and ball today I realized that I really did need a little bit more equipment. My elbow kept popping as I was using the weight ball which to me means its too heavy and I need to work up to it so I have to go get a couple of smaller weights to life. I need a yoga mat so my knees aren't killed by sitting on the floor and so I can do some yoga poses. And a resistance band would also be nice to get some more arm work in. I am a complete wimp I couldn't do more than five sit ups, my stomach cramped and hurt and I know that's a good sign but my back is killing me! I don't know if I did something wrong or if its just my muscles being stretched out. I think I definitely need a second protein shake bottle, so when one is dirty I can still use it since I have to use it three times one day and once every other day. I bought the iPod holder so I can go out running and have music to listen to and I am really excited to use it. I hope it works correctly. And yeah, there is the update. See I did sorta win, at least I worked out a little, now I need to do the protein shakes and then I am good. Whoo I feel good, minus the back, the back is in pain.